My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize
