I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
