Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize