I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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