Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
