it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Randomize