At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
