id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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