found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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