Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
