i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
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