you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
