Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
