You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
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