Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You brought string cheese to the strip club
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
