i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
