Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
