I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
