I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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