Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
