dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
