Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
