your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize