? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
