Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
