everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize