I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
