I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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