This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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