Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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