he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
