Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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