You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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