If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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