I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
