I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
