You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
