I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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