Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
