i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I stole a fireplace last night.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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