i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
The Olympian is in my bed
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize