why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize