i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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