maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
