is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Life is so much better after having sex.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
