Your favorite bartender is back from prision
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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