he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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