Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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