i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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