Got a toothbrush?
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize