we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
