i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Randomize
